Erasmus 'n Kinkajou 
Kinkajou : BASIC TRAVEL PHRASES
Erasmus: MAKE A LIST OF YOUR ADDRESSES: ACCOMMODATION, TRAIN STATIONS, BUS STATIONS, SHOPPING CENTRES, MARKETS, TOURIST ATTRACTIONS OR OTHER PLACES YOU INTEND TO VISIT. BEING ABLE TO SHOW A TAXI DRIVER A WRITTEN ADDRESS IN YOUR TARGET LANGUAGE CAN WELL SAVE YOU A LOT OF DISCOMFORT AND TROUBLE.
Erasmus:WHERE IS THE BATHROOM/TOILET/RESTROOM? (Critical)
WHERE IS THE TRAIN STATION?
WHERE IS THE BUS STATION?
I NEED ……..?
I WOULD LIKE …..?
WHERE IS THE ………. ?
HOW DO I GET TO _____ ?
...THE TRAIN STATION?
...THE BUS STATION?
...THE AIRPORT?
...THE YOUTH HOSTEL?
...THE _____ HOTEL?
CAN YOU SHOW ME ON THE MAP?
TAXI
TAKE ME TO _____, PLEASE.
HOW MUCH DOES IT COST TO GO TO _____?
TAKE ME THERE, PLEASE.
NEED
WANT
LIKE
WHERE IS MY ROOM?
WHERE IS THE BEACH?
WHERE IS THE BAR?
DON'T TOUCH ME! (ESPECIALLY IMPORTANT FOR WOMEN).
Woman Travelling on Train
Erasmus:NO CASH (you may need to keep repeating this one to get the message through. Cash can be difficult to access overseas. My partner took out money and forgot to retrieve the credit card. Disaster. International mobile phone calls to The US based Credit Agencies to obtain cash, can easily set you back $1000.
Most credit cards work for credit purchase transactions everywhere, but some will not interface with automatic teller machines, even at the airport. You can get into trouble really quickly if you are not carrying a suitable amount of cash.
Erasmus:ONLY CREDIT CARD
HOW MUCH, PRICE?
TOO MUCH
NO THANK YOU, I AM ONLY LOOKING.
BILL?
CAN I HAVE THE BILL?
BUS
CAR CAB (TAXI)
TRAIN PORT, TRAIN STATION
AIR PORT
SHIP PORT SHIP DOCK
WATER
FOOD
TICKET
AUTOMATIC TELLER MACHINE
I NEED HELP
DOCTOR
CLINIC
HOSPITAL, HURT, SICK, ALLERGY, PHARMACY, CHEMIST, DRUG STORE
POLICE
EMBASSY
SUPERMARKET (Not always findable in many south-east Asian countries).
MUSEUM
CHURCH
HELLO, HI
PLEASE
THANK YOU, THANKS
EXCUSE ME
SORRY, I AM SORRY
EXIT
(If you don’t know the word or sign for exit, you can wander around in some terminals for quite some time. It can be very easy to get lost in a train station like Shibuya, Tokyo or in some stations on the metro rail lines in London).
ENTRANCE, WARNING, DANGER.
It can be useful to know the symbols or signage associated with these words in the target language.
YES
NO
NOT SURE
MAYBE
LESS
MORE
GOOD MORNING.
GOOD EVENING.
GOOD NIGHT.
GOODBYE, BYE
Erasmus: NAMES:
PEOPLE: this may include job descriptions of people you are likely to interact with.
DO YOU SPEAK [LANGUAGE]?
I DO NOT SPEAK (LANGUAGE). I DO NOT SPEAK [LANGUAGE] WELL.
I DO NOT UNDERSTAND
I DO NOT KNOW
I NEED HELP, HELP!
WHERE IS…?
DOES THIS GO TO…?
WHICH WAY TO…?
NEED […..] FAST!
I YOU WE THEY HE SHE
MAN WOMAN BOY GIRL CHILD BABE
GO THERE
COME HERE
LEAVE NOW
LEAVE SOON
HELLO
Greeting people in their own language in a foreign country improves interpersonal relationships and helps to establish friendships. In creating a bond, it means you’re much more likely to get help when you need it. You should always check if there are complete phrases and different responses to greetings.
For example, in Arabic, the first person says, "as-salaam aleikum" in greeting, and the second responds, "wa-aleikum salaam."
Goo : PLEASE/THANK YOU
Many languages and cultures demand a more linguistically formal approach than English, and it is easy to accidentally offend someone by omitting the equivalent of "please" from a question or even a restaurant order. The phrase “thank you” falls into the same category. It can be a significant mistake to omit this in your conversation.
In many languages “please” translates to a phrase, rather than to a single word.
Goo : YES/NO
Knowing how to say “no” can be critical if you’re travelling alone, especially for women. While “yes” and “no” can often be can fudged quite well by hand gestures, head gestures and facial expressions, it simplifies communication to know these basic words.
Goo : I DON'T SPEAK [INSERT LANGUAGE HERE]. SLOW DOWN
I SPEAK [LANGUAGE].
If you have successfully introduced yourself and exchange some key phrases, people may expect you to be able to communicate in their language. Often others cannot intuitively realise that you do not speak their language.
Even if you do speak their language somewhat, it may be hard to understand at usual conversational speeds, if you are not very familiar with the language. Being able to ask people to slow down and simplify the communication may be enough to allow your simple vocabulary to work for you in communicating.
Goo : WHERE IS THE BATHROOM?
In my opinion this is the single most important phrase that traveller needs to know. You can be arrested for urinating or defecating in public or semi-public. I think no one wants to use gestures or miming to help them to find toilet.
Many toilets these days have pictures denoting male or female or use the archaic symbols for male and female, so finding toilets can be easy in places with “international” signage.
Goo : ALLERGY
If you have allergies, I believe it is critical to learn the names of these foods or additives in the local language. It is always possible to combine your verbiage with miming “choking”, but why not just learn the words instead. Play it safe.
Erasmus: NUMBERS
ONE
TWO
THREE
FOUR
FIVE
SIX
SEVEN
EIGHT
NINE
TEN
NIL
ZERO
Counting is a basic ingrained and learned sequence. Treat the words as single phrases because that’s the method through which you will learn and memorize them. Numbers are very useful for many things: reading prices, telling times, ordering food items, asking for multiple things. So they are worth putting in the effort to remember.
FINGERS AND ----- CALCULATORS AND PHONES are often very useful as well.
NUMBERS IN MOST LANGUAGES HAVE A REPETITIVE FORMAT. e.g. twenty two, twenty three, twenty four, twenty five, twenty six thirty two, thirty three, thirty four, thirty five, thirty six etc. consequently they can be quite easy to learn.
Erasmus: 
Erasmus:
Goo :
Commandant :
Beethoven and Frobisher:
Dr AXxxxx :
Kinkajou : 
Kinkajou :
Dr Xxxxx:
Erasmus met Dr Xxxxx and over a number of years grew to develop a belief in the problems of our world.
Erasmus is an old dog, but he reckons he still can do new tricks. He’s been around, and up and down a few dry creek beds in his lifetime .Born into servitude at the Daisy Hill Puppy Farm, Erasmus quickly realised the world could be a hostile and dangerous place. Puppies disappeared daily, never to be seen again.
Kinkajou: Features in our web sites as an adventurer but he is equally accomplished in the art of reasoning and has often followed the comments of Erasmus to their logical conclusion. His belief in the truth leads him to always "tell it true". This is the world as it can be seen and this is the real world.
Dr Xxxxx. This good doctor actually represents a diversity of opinions held by a small cabal of medically aware people.
Dr AXxxxx. Simply best described as a cold inhuman bastard, Erasmus says we are indeed lucky to have this paranoid psychopath on our side. In spite of his antecedents, his perspective is valuable for us to use to understand our world. Dr AXxxxx’s past background is in taking charge and being master at the helm of the ship of destiny. Control is the ultimate goal. Nothing must stand in the way of control. Domination not cooperation. Suspect your enemies and kill them first, preferably after extracting all useful information. Your destiny is yours to make and to take. Vengeance is a heady mix to this paranoic murderer.
The Commandant: Head of our security detail, the Commandant believes in doing the right thing and always considering safe options. However, his view of what is right is coloured by association with Erasmus, Kinkajou and the doctors Xxxxx.
Frobisher & Beethoven: These guys are our bullywot "security mooks", Frobisher is the literate one while Beethoven provides just more raw muscle power. While Officious and Intolerant of transgressions, they none the less have a sensitive and fragile side to their natures, an aspect their personality totally at odds with their aggressive and fierce appearance.
Goo is a simple and humble mammal.(Actually a marsupial numbat really). His ability to change the world is limited by his meagre intellect and his short life span. Furthermore, as a member of an endangered species, he has to face the prospect of personal death as well as species extinction. He could one day be the last of his kind.